Fate has an odd sense of humor

Posted on Sun Jan 8, 2012 @ 1:10am by Fleet Captain Rhea Kennit

834 words; about a 4 minute read

U.S.S. Voyager

After leaving sickbay, the Captain had a few things to attend to prior to finally going to the Bridge. With the overall situation aboard ship being calm for the moment, she retreated to her quarters where she put the medication Dr. Blaire had prescribed for her into a drawer by the nightstand where it would be easy to reach in the event she decided to give it a try. That done, she sat down for a moment at her desk and wrote a short personal log, feeling the need to get a few things she was thinking and feeling down for her own personal records before she reported to the Bridge. Chakotay clearly had things well in hand, if he'd needed her she was confident that he would have contacted her.

Besides.

The man was her First Officer. Maquis, ex-Maquis.. however one chose to view the point he was XO and she needed to show confidence in him. Both for the Starfleet personnel, and for the former Maquis members of their combined crew. If they were ever going to be succesful in merging the two different groups into one. If they were ever going to get past the 'Starfleet vs. Maquis' mentality which continued to rear it's head on a far too regular basis everyone on-board had to make an effort to achieve that goal.

It was a small enough thing to do, to leave the ship in the XO's control while she was preoccupied with other business but Kathryn knew that in the eyes of some of the former-Maquis at least, it would make an impression.

Hopefully a positive impression.

Chakotay was more than just her First Officer.. Last night had proven that much for certain! She should be mortified, angry with herself for giving into emotion but all she felt was..

Happy.

Absurdly so.

Just thinking of him and she wanted to see him. That was something she was going to have to control for now, at least until she'd figured out a few things for herself. Regulations were pretty clear regarding fraternization among officers. Regulations had not been written to cover a situation like the one in which Voyager and it's crew currently found themselves either.

Seventy years from home. Seventy years from the Federation, from Starfleet, from everything that was familiar. From everything that was safe.

There was no way she could hope to expect her crew to not form attachments with one another, to not reach out to another and seek comfort and strength in friendships, or more.. She wasn't stupid either. Kathryn knew some of the crew had already begun to develop closer relationships with one another.. and so long as it did not interfere with the ship's day to day operations she was not going to take action to prohibit it.

After all, she'd spent three years trying to bury her feelings for Chakotay. Three years and the moment she saw him she'd been nearly overcome by all of those emotions surging back .. Mixed in with a healthy dose of anger at his having left the way he did..

They'd have to be discreet, but she wasn't going to ask him to try and hide it either. Discreet..


:: I've lost my mind.. :: she thought to herself while laughing a little at herself. :: If ever there was a situation that could push a ship's captain over that edge.. this one is it.. ::


Her gaze fell on the photo of Mark set on her book shelf then, and Kathryn rose to pick up the frame and gaze at the man's image. She'd loved him.. but not with the same intensity that she felt for Chakotay. She'd tried to love him. Mark was intelligent, kind and gentle. A literary professor, who had no idea what it was like to be an officer in Starfleet. No idea what her day to day job duties entailed. They'd had issues between them as a result, his frustration at times when duty prevented her from attending a function with him. Or when she was unable to contact him for days at a time.

By now, no doubt about it Mark - and every one else for that matter - believed she, and Voyager's entire crew were lost. They'd have been declared missing in action, presumed dead. He would be moving on, and she knew she'd already moved on as well.

Removing the ring she'd worn up till that moment, she placed the ring and the photo into a small box which she used a few of her weeks replicator rations to create and the placed both the ring, and the photo into a storage drawer in her quarters. Maybe one day she'd get the chance to return it to him..

She smiled a little, thinking of her First Officer. She'd never thought to see him again and yet.. here they were.

Sometimes Fate has a very odd sense of humor..

 

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