The Lonely

Posted on Sun Feb 7, 2016 @ 9:20pm by Lieutenant Cassandra Kennings

954 words; about a 5 minute read

Mission: The Fall
Location: Cassandra's Office

Tom found it incredibly difficult to focus on his repairs much less any of his other duties. It didn't matter what hatch he opened or whenever he turned on a phase inverter. Every single time he had a flash of Penny in that lab. Tom didn't understand it at all. She'd never disclosed to him that she was... what... an android? Some sort of cyborg?

In retrospect, he had his own suspicions that there was something more to Penny. The way she reacted in certain situations and the way she presented some thoughts were almost mechanical. Not to mention taking the shock that she did in the Holodeck and walking away without any nerve damage and with the loss of a scar. How does someone survive thousands of volts and look better in the process?

Her personnel file didn't contain any helpful information either. As an enlisted Chief Petty Officer, Tom had exercised several boundaries between himself and the officer grades, including reviewing personnel files. He worked day in and day out with inexperienced ensigns and lieutenants, and while he could easily access their files to learn more on how to help them, he preferred to work with them on an individual basis and face-to-face. Reading Penny's file was the first time he'd broken his own rule.

He quickly drew up a short list on the Victory who knew the truth. Miguel was on the top, but Tom wouldn't dream of confronting the Chief Engineer. That day in the lab, Miguel looked the most uncomfortable. Perhaps it was sprung on him that very day. He assumed the doctor knew, and he also assumed she'd tell him nothing. The last person on the list was the Counselor. She'd probably tell him as much as Doctor Anderson, but she'd been the most open to him over the last few months. It was worth a try.

===========

Cassandra tended not to sit behind her desk if she could help it. She found being trapped in that small corner of her office too confining and much preferred to be out in the center of the room somewhere. At the moment, she was lying back in a large, squashy ball-shaped chair that she could sink into and stay comfortable.

When her chime rang, she stood up quickly and checked her gold compact. She sighed slightly and steeled herself for the inevitable, snapping her fingers at the furniture.

She walked to the doors and opened them, smiling. "Come in, Thomas," she said, gesturing to the two armchairs they'd sat in the last time he was there.

Tom paused in the doorway. He wasn't exactly taken aback by her smile and hospitality, but then again he didn't quite know what to expect. What he did know was that he didn't want to sit down. He stepped further inside to let the doors close. "Penny..." he said before all words escaped his thoughts. "She's a...a..." He sighed. "She's not...not human."

"Correct," Cassandra said, her voice somber, her smile somewhat sad. "I'm sorry I couldn't say anything, but I have to respect her privacy both as her friend and her counselor." She put a hand on his arm and gave it a gentle squeeze. "Tell me what you're feeling."

He didn't know what it was, but Tom felt himself relax a little, at least just enough to accept the chair next to her. "Hurt," he said after a heavy sigh. "Like she didn't trust me." Tom released a nervous chuckle, followed by, "I mean I get why. Well, I do and don't. Both at the same time. But still..."

Cassandra nodded. "That's a perfectly understandable reaction," she said. "We expect total openness from the ones we're intimate with, and when it feels like one is holding back, there's a natural tendency to feel a 'lack of trust.'" She reached over and patted his hand, looking into his eyes. "But I can assure you, she trusts you more than nearly any other person she's met, and that includes her parents."

She sat back and sighed. "The question now is, what do you want to do next?"

He thought about that for a few moments, and every thought that floated through was a question meant only for Penny. "I guess I need to talk to her." He looked over at Cassandra, while his mind wandered back to the lab and how he had reacted. "But I don't know how I can do that without coming across... hurt or defensive. Plus, I have a feeling I've done enough damage already."

"Mmm," Cassandra said. "Well, I have suggested she speak with you as well. She was under the impression you would want her as far away from you as possible. I told her that may not be the case and to keep an open mind."

She crossed her legs. "It's okay to sound hurt. You have a right to feel that way, and a bit defensive as well. One of the perils of being in love with someone is opening oneself up to being hurt. One of the benefits is the ability to forgive. My father's mother liked to quote an old Earth saying: to err is human, to forgive, divine. The sooner you and she talk, the better off you'll be."

Tom nodded. "Then I guess I better go see Penny," he replied. "Thanks, Counselor."

Cassandra nodded and smiled. "A very good idea. And you're welcome, Thomas."

She stood up and gestured to the door. "I'll see you soon," she said.

Smiling to the Counselor, Tom rose from his chair and left the room. His next stop, the quarters of one Lieutenant Naroot.


JP


Dr. Cassandra Sanders
Ship's Counselor

Thomas Barnes
COO

 

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